Instructions to Myself

If you'd like to meditate the way I meditate, here's how:

Sit in a recliner without any shoes on, and put the soles of your feet together.  Rest your wrists on the outsides of your knees, palms up, with the tip of your thumb touching the tip of your index finger on each hand.  The nerve endings in the soles of your feet and the tips of your fingers and thumbs will be pushing against each other slightly, and, at least in your feet, this creates some "bilateral sensory input" associated with EMDR, which seems to help brains heal from stuff that damages them.  I didn't know this when I started doing it.  My thinking was that if meditating gurus have some decent reason to connect their forefinger tips to their thumbs, then connecting the soles of my feet might provide the same kind of benefit.

If you want, push one of your thumbs slightly into the tip of that forefinger, and then push the forefinger into the thumb, just a little bit.  Then push the foot on that side slightly against the other foot. I tried this for the first time this morning and it brought a slight feeling of well-being. That could have been psychosomatic, but that doesn't mean it isn't good or real. The placebo effect can cure illnesses, especially when we torture ourselves as much as many people do.

Relax. Stop trying and give up. I view meditation as a lack of intent, and letting go of all your intentions is, paradoxically, an intention. It's okay. Be at peace with yourself. There is no "trying" to meditate. Either you're doing it, or you're not. In the case of meditation, Yoda's instruction is unavoidable.

You may notice sounds, smells, emotions, memories, visual effects, a taste, or physical sensations in your body. You are becoming more present to your existence. I heard once that the goal of meditation is for the meditator to realize the meditator.  Make your self real, but your real self, not the meat  suit with which you usually identify. Again, paradoxically, this seems to occur for me without effort when I stop making any effort.

Thoughts come, and that's okay. While not trying to avoid engaging them, I guess I'm just kind of lazy in response to the thoughts. If it's important, it will come back when I'm not meditating.  I give myself permission to pause my meditation if a thought warrants it, for example to avoid unnecessarily inconveniencing someone.

I will never stop trying to make other people more like myself.  I love myself and my life too much to keep that from others 😊